Get Drunk, Be…Byoordaaaffuuurl

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“Umeshu is made by steeping unripened Japanese plums in alcohol and sugar to allow the flavors to infuse, some bottles even come with the whole plum still inside! This type of alcohol tastes sweet and sour and is great mixed with soda or drunk straight on the rocks.”

“This umeshu plum wine with added collagen, is a sweet and fruity alcohol tailored towards a young female audience. The added collagen helps rejuvenate the skin.” It is “brewed with famously pure fushimizu water which helps to give it a smooth texture.”

“Fushimi is famous for its underground spring known as “Fushimizu”,which water is pure and delicious. ”Fushi-Mizu”: Fushimi’s quality ground water, is best suited to the brewing of sake, bringing out the full flavor of rice and creating high quality sake with a smooth texture.”

Alcohol can cause decreased social inhibition, temporarily impair eyesight, cloud judgment and contribute to illusion. The promise of youth on the label sows the seed. Ensuing neurochemical reactions brings the Strangler Fig to full growth. Hon, that’s not exactly a healthy blush. And, yes, you iz still muffin-toppin’.

*cue in Ke$ha*

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