Food H̶a̶c̶k̶ F(NSFW)k: The Really Sexy Red Velvet Ice Blended

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2014-02-24 20.54.47

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Chewing can get tedious. The Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf made a Red Velvet Ice Blended available for their holiday offering. Thanks to that, we were able to chug down fats and sugars conveniently through a straw. Yup, it’s no good for you but, God, is it good! “Sweet, creamy, chocolate flavors of a red velvet cupcake.”

In the tradition of food hacks, I thought I’d give it my spin and attempt a “healthy” version. I quartered a “Sultry, Sexy Red Velvet” Cupcake from one of my favorite local shops, The Cupcake Theory, and tossed it into my Shake n’ Take with a glass of non-fat milk and a handful of ice cubes. I added…wait for it…Metformin, to decrease absorption of glucose/sugars, and…wait for it…Xenical, to prevent the absorption of fats. Blended until smooth.

A test sip assured me it was within the CBTL ballpark. I served the rest to my Gran and mom. They loved it. Bottoms up!
Credits to La Emmanuela for the coaster from Country Crafts and the printed straw from Party Hat. Both establishments are located along Banilad Road, Cebu City. The Cupcake Theory is located at the second floor of Robinsons Cybergate, Fuente Osmena, Cebu City.

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